Parenting styles have changed over the years and gentle parenting is on the rise as a more respectful way of parenting. Unlike traditional discipline methods that use punishment, this method uses empathy, communication and boundaries with kindness.
Gentle parenting is based on four main principles: respect, understanding, empathy and boundaries.
Instead of punishing children for misbehaviour, parents guide them by explaining consequences, helping them regulate emotions and encouraging good decision-making.
For example, if a child throws a toy, instead of yelling, a gentle parent would calmly explain why throwing is not safe and ask the child to help clean up.
Benefits of Gentle Parenting
- Encourages emotional intelligence
- Builds parent-child trust
- Reduces fear based behaviour
- Promotes self discipline and responsibility
Research shows that children raised with this approach have higher self esteem and better social skills than those exposed to harsh discipline.
How to Practice Gentle Parenting
Gentle parenting takes time, patience and self awareness. Here’s how to start:
1. Respond with Empathy
Children act out when they’re overwhelmed. Instead of reacting with frustration, try to understand their feelings. Saying “I see you’re upset. Do you want to talk about it?” helps a child feel heard.
2. Set Clear Kind Boundaries
Boundaries are necessary, but they don’t have to be harsh. Instead of saying “Stop running!” try “We walk inside to stay safe.” This teaches the lesson without fear.
3. Model the Behaviour You Want
Children imitate what they see. If you stay calm in stressful situations, they will learn to do the same. For example, if you’re feeling overwhelmed, instead of snapping, try saying “I’m feeling frustrated right now, so I’m going to take a deep breath before I respond.”
This teaches children it’s okay to have big feelings, but also how to manage them in a healthy way. By consistently modelling respect, kindness and self control, you set the foundation for the behaviour you want to see in your child.
4. Use Positive Discipline
Instead of punishment, teach. If a child refuses to share, say: “Sharing helps everyone have fun. How about we take turns?” For example, if a child refuses to share a toy, instead of saying “If you don’t share, I’m taking it away”, you can reframe it as a teaching moment: “Sharing helps everyone have fun.
How about we take turns so both of you get to play?” This way, you encourage cooperation not resentment through the use of threats or violence. Over time, children will develop empathy, problem solving skills and a sense of fairness, not just obedience out of fear of consequences.
Why Some Parents Find Gentle Parenting Hard
Some parents find gentle parenting hard, especially if they were raised with punishment. Moving from punishment to empathy takes time, consistency and a new way of thinking.
It can be frustrating at times, but understanding these struggles will help parents navigate them better.
- It takes time and consistency.
- Many parents were raised with punishment and this is foreign to them.
- Challenges the idea that obedience = respect.
Despite the struggles, the long term benefits outweigh it all.
Gentle Parenting in a Digital Age
Technology makes parenting easier, but it also brings risks. Many parents use a VPN (Virtual Private Network) to protect their children’s online activities. A VPN encrypts internet traffic and keeps personal information safe from hackers and trackers. This is especially useful when children use public Wi-Fi or social media, where privacy is a huge concern.
Conclusion
Gentle parenting isn’t about letting kids do whatever they want. It’s about leading them with respect – not fear. Hard, but they become safe, brave, emotionally intelligent and gentle. Isn’t that what we want?
