Watching my kids deal with some kind of emotional trauma is horrible. As Elizabeth, our youngest, progresses from toddler to pre-schooler, I find we’re dealing more of these experiences.
Ultimately, it’s merely a sign she is growing up and figuring out how the world works. Along the way, however, there are inevitably some tears.
Yesterday, for instance, was a bit of a tough one. Elizabeth wanted to play with Helen, her big sister. Helen wasn’t interested. She made this clear in a way that wasn’t rude, but maybe wasn’t as sensitive as it could have been.
The result? An emotional outburst from Elizabeth. It was the kind of outburst that has, until now, been quite rare for her. Only cuddles would calm her down.
It was an awkward situation to deal with. I felt the need to defend Helen’s wish not to play with her sibling and yet I also understood that Elizabeth felt totally rejected.
Up to this point, Elizabeth has been quite an outgoing, thick skinned kid. In many respects the same still applies, but she is unquestionably more sensitive than before.
This cuts both ways. Not only is she more sensitive to rejection, but she’s become more affectionate, especially with me. I’ve noticed that she will quietly climb into my lap to watch television or read books, something she previously did only very rarely. She’s also requesting hugs with greater frequency.
It’s clear our relationship is changing. Elizabeth has always been more of a mummy’s girl. In the past I’ve been able to read the signals clearly and known when it’s been my time to step back and simply let Gill, my wife, deal with her.
As Elizabeth gets older, things are shifting. She’s more at ease with me, yet definitely more emotional.
I don’t recall her sister going through such a phase. That said, as a second time parent. I think I pick up on these things more. Added to that, the two kids can be very different; Helen quiet and a thinker while Elizabeth is more impulsive.
I have a strange feeling that what I’m presently experiencing is a precursor to the demanding teenaged-years. Lucky me, ‘ey?
Have you witnessed changes like this in your children? Did yours suddenly become more affectionate or did it occur slowly? More to the point, do you have teenage kids and have I just witnessed my future?
Pic credit; Joe Schalbotnik. Sourced from Flikr and reproduced under Creative Commons agreement.
5 thoughts on “It’s all getting a bit emotional”
We have this all to come with the twins it must be very difficult but as you say it’s part of growing up I’m sure as they get older they will be the best of friends #brilliantblogposts
Oh my word Nigel, of course you have twins. That is going to be fun. Good luck!
My DD was an emotional baby and toddler and preschooler and guess what. At 10 she’s still emotional. But accompanying all the eye rolling and door slamming this means there’s empathy for me in my disability and for her friends in the playground and that’s amazing to see. I know we’re going to have an exciting time in the teenage years, but I wouldn’t change it for the world. But you might want to ask me again in 3 years and see if I’ve emigrated. #brillblogposts
I have an idea. You emigrate first, tell me how things are wherever you go and if it’s worked out….I’ll follow. Yes, our youngest has always been the more emotional of our two kids. No, I wouldn’t want her to change one bit.
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