The ironing board and its part in my downfall

 

ironing, ironing board, injury, broken little toe, fractured toe

Pic credit below.

I am injured. Yes, it’s true, I have sustained a bizarre injury in odd circumstances.

The more creative of you are probably thinking of hamsters, butter nut squash and parcel tape. Alas, we’re not talking about anything along those lines.

I have broken the little toe of my left foot. I achieved this feat following a run-in with our ironing board yesterday.

The odd thing is I wasn’t even using the ironing board at the time. It was simply in our living room, standing there, like a nervous, young debutante at her first formal dance, hoping that a male suitor would soon lead her on to the dancefloor.

There was absolutely no hope of me doing any ironing yesterday. The fact of the matter is that Mrs Adams was working from home. It was one of the few days of the week when our toddler was at nursery for the morning and I was immersed in blog stuff.

With my head in the virtual world and Mrs Adams at home, I had to do something, anything, to hint that I was on top of things on the domestic front. Leaving the ironing board in situ was a signal that some ironing might, just possibly, get done.

This was a mistake. Without giving it any thought whatsoever, I rushed into the living room at a quick pace with my head full of goodness knows what. I had nothing on my feet and wasn’t paying attention to my surroundings.

Bam! My left foot caught the leg of the ironing board. The ironing board was sent sprawling towards the floor and my wedding band flew off my finger in the resulting melee, making a distinctive tinkling sound as it hit the ground.

What followed was not pretty. I might have called the ironing board an exceptionally rude name. You know, like, a really very rude name indeed.

The next few minutes were spent either limping around the room trying to figure out how badly I was hurt or rolling around on the floor rubbing the lower half of my leg as pain coursed through it. As my wife commented later; “It must have been just like childbirth.”

Later that afternoon I turned up at my eldest daughter’s school. As luck would have it, we had an old crutch in the garage and I lurched into the school yard using this thing. As you can imagine I became an object of curiosity. People became even more curious when I explained exactly how I had sustained this injury. I mean come on, how many people have you met that have broken a bone following a brush with a relatively minor piece of domestic hardware?

broken toe, fractured toe, ironing board

This little piggy went to hospital. The aforementioned toe, strapped up to its neighbour. Note the brusing ebbing out from under the dressing.

During the course of today the pain has ebbed and flowed. The toe continued to swell and bruising has steadily engulfed the entire thing. In fact the bruising is spreading and making some headway up my foot.

I was repeatedly told I should go and get my foot looked at with considerable concern coming from the mums and dads in the playground (okay, several mums and one dad but the dad was very concerned for me nonetheless).

After today’s school run I made my way to the local hospital, my eldest daughter coming along for the journey. The practice nurse confirmed the inevitable; I had a break and the only thing that could be done was to strap the toe to the one next to it. It’ll take about six weeks to heal and I can expect to be in pain for the first seven days. Wish me luck.

What’s the weirdest injury you have sustained? How did you do it? Go on, leave a comment below and tell us what you did.

Pic credit; Frank C Muller. Sourced from Wikipedia. Reproduced under Creative Commons agreement 3.0.

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29 Comments

  1. May 14, 2015 / 9:35 pm

    Man up and try giving birth! Lol!, Ouch though. I’ve broken a toe…it hurts!

    • John Adams
      Author
      May 16, 2015 / 9:08 am

      I’m pretty sure my wife was being sarcastic!

    • John Adams
      Author
      May 16, 2015 / 9:07 am

      Thank you ever so much. It is very much appreciated.

  2. May 14, 2015 / 10:01 pm

    Pft. You’ve got it all wrong. You needed to have told everyone you were practicing your Bruce Lee moves on a pile of unyielding bricks.
    You don’t want sympathy, you want AWE 🙂

    • John Adams
      Author
      May 16, 2015 / 9:07 am

      Yes, I take your point1 Next time I break somehting I’ll keep your advice in mind.

  3. May 14, 2015 / 10:10 pm

    See I knew ironing boards were dangerous, that’s why I avoid mine until I have no where else to hide the ironing pile when someone comes round!

    The poorly foot made me wince in sympathy but the leaving the board out on purpose made me laugh, as my poor boyfriend is forever tripping over out hoover because I leave it out after use to make sure he sees I’ve been busy!

    Stevie ☺

    • John Adams
      Author
      May 16, 2015 / 9:06 am

      Just be careful next time you leave a hoover lying around. You may cause an accident!

  4. May 14, 2015 / 10:12 pm

    Oh John I shouldn’t laugh but that’s a funny post. Can just imagine you tripping over the ironing board and swearing at it! I hope the pinky is doing alright though, broken toes are really annoying. Tricky to strap the diddy one too!

    I’ve broken toes twice now, the last time doing a 20km volcano trek in NZ. Something we decided to do on the spur of the moment the day after a boozy wedding! Eejit 🙂

    • John Adams
      Author
      May 16, 2015 / 9:06 am

      A 20KM run after a boozy wedding sounds like an intersting way to deal with a hangover! At least it’ll be healed for BritMums Live.

  5. May 15, 2015 / 7:32 pm

    I wonder how many times ‘lol’ has appeared in one comment box on a blog?! Whoopsadaisy! #brilliantblogposts

    • John Adams
      Author
      May 16, 2015 / 9:03 am

      Yeah, I can assure you I didn’t say “whoopsadaisy” when I broke the thing! I was a little more vocal.

  6. May 16, 2015 / 6:29 am

    This really made me laugh! And I can really relate to toe breaking by stubbing it on inanimate household objects – not an ironing board though, actually can’t remember the last time we got ours out – definitely not getting it out anytime soon now! Keep up the great writing! #bigfatlinky

    • John Adams
      Author
      May 16, 2015 / 9:01 am

      Thanks for your kind words about my writing. When you do get that ironing board out, be very carteful with it.

  7. May 16, 2015 / 6:30 am

    oooh you poor toe. This further fuels my argument to my Mum that ironing is evil and should never be undertaken, I’ve had similar injuries with the hoover but unfortunately I can’t chuck that out!! Get well soon toe xx #bigfatlinky

    • John Adams
      Author
      May 16, 2015 / 9:00 am

      Oddly, you are not the first to say this accident proves the futility of ironing. The ultimate excuse it would seem!

  8. May 16, 2015 / 7:19 am

    Ouch that looks painful. I’ve stubbed my toe many times but have never broken it! My next door neighbour fell down the stairs recently and broke hers! My most perculiar incident was to someone else! Waking down the stairs on Christmas morning in socks and carrying heavy presents, I slipped, went down on my bum, tripped my nan who was walking in front of me and she went flying, landing full pelt on the hall floor and guess what? She broke her arm! Christmas morning was spent waiting from them to come back from A&E! hope your toe heals quickly 🙂 #bigfatlinky

    • John Adams
      Author
      May 16, 2015 / 8:59 am

      I have to salute you Lisa, your accident outranks mine massively. I’m impressed.

  9. May 16, 2015 / 10:01 pm

    Clearly a strategic plot to ensure you are not expected to be left alone with an ironing board again 😉

    • John Adams
      Author
      May 20, 2015 / 5:58 am

      In which case it failed. I’ve used it several times since, without incident.

  10. May 16, 2015 / 10:49 pm

    Ouch. Hope the pain’s not too bad. I’ve broken toes before although never it quite as unorthodox a circumstance as yours! It’s one of those annoying injuries – it hurts like buggery but because it’s a little toe it’s regarded as trivial in the way that a broken arm in a sling wouldn’t be. As for it being as painful as childbirth, of course it isn’t. It’s far more painful than that, and the pain of childbirth only lasts for a few hours at worst. Pah. Mums don’t know how easy they have it! 😉

    • John Adams
      Author
      May 20, 2015 / 5:52 am

      An annoying, painful injury. That sums it up Tim. For fear of my life I won’t respond to your childbirth comments!

  11. May 17, 2015 / 6:05 am

    Ouch! That was very unlucky. How often do people stub their toes and it’s nothing? The pain, treatment and healing time remind me a lot of my daughter and her broken finger, which should officially be mended on Tuesday!

    • John Adams
      Author
      May 20, 2015 / 5:51 am

      I was taken aback at the suggested healing time. Thankfully all on the mend now. Hope your daughter’s finger has healed too.

  12. May 21, 2015 / 9:35 am

    Is this why you did the life insurance post? Tired of activities trying to take you out! 😉 #bigfatlinky

    • John Adams
      Author
      May 21, 2015 / 10:06 am

      Very good Martyn! I fear the two were unrelated.