Izzy might be ready to start school, but I don’t feel prepared!

It’s all becoming very real: my youngest daughter will shortly start school. Of course we’ve known this as a family for ages, but the countdown really has now begun.

What’s made it seem so real? Well, little Izzy has just had a settling in morning. I dropped her off so she could spend a couple of hours with classmates and teaching staff and familairise herself with the environment.

It was strange dropping her off. I walked out of school gates feeling at a loss.

It was such an odd sensation. The past four years have been a constant blur of school drop off and picks for Helen and three – sometimes four – mornings a week, I’d be dropping offand picking up Izzy from pre-school as well. Here I was, getting a taste of what it might be like for me in September; a slightly more sedate life with only the one drop off and pick up each day at the same location.

It’s going to be very strange, not having a little person around so often. When I explained this to Izzy the other day, she said I could play with her toys as a way of keeping loneliness at bay.

I won’t lie, I have struggled over the past year. Balancing an increasingly demanding family life with what I want to do hasn’t been easy.

Now things are going to change and I will have a little more time for myself, well, I don’t know what to make of it! You’d image I’d be celebrating but I am going to miss having Izzy around.

If the experience we had with her sister is anything to go by, I also know Izzy will go through a massive developmental phase as soon as she starts school. By Christmas she will be a different child with basic literacy skills, basic numeracy skills and will be a full-on school kid, not a pre-schooler any longer.

As Izzy is my youngest child, this should be easier. I’ve been through all this once before.

Only thing is, I haven’t. Sure, I’ve waved my eldest child off to school before, but never my youngest. That’s a different thing altogether as it’s the last time I’ll do it.

It’s all change in this household. This was always going to happen.

At the end of her settling in morning, Izzy came out of school following the teacher’s instructions perfectly. She enjoyed herself and has been asking when she can go back.

By rights I should be worried about Izzy starting school. At this point in time she seems fine with it and I hope that continues over the summer.

It seems like it’s the father, me, who is completely unprepared for this change. I’ll be fine with it all in the end, of this I’m sure, but I think it’s going to be a bigger change for me that I realised.