predictions for life after lockdown

I’ve written a lot over recent weeks about the impact of Coronavirus on my family’s life. For this blog post I thought I’d take a look at the future and have a go at making some predictions for life after lockdown. Only thing is, I couldn’t take this task too seriously.

From shopping and fake intellectualism to the return of overtly hairy men, I hope you enjoy my predictions. If you have any ideas of your own, please do add them in a comment at the end.

Shopping for the family will get boring again

For weeks now, when I’ve walked out the door and gone to the shops, I’ve told my family the items they’ve asked me to get are no more than a “wish list.” They’re to be grateful with what they get, end of story.

If Mrs Adams asks me to by a white Burgundy and passata and I return home with four tins of Carling and a jar of vegan pesto, she knows it’s because that’s all the store had in stock. I’ve returned from every shopping trip with some kind of story to tell and shopping has been a bit like playing roulette, I’ve had no idea what I’d be returning home with.

I know my family’s expectations will increase as lockdown rules are relaxed and logistics improve. Odd as it may be, I think I will look back on this era with a strange nostalgia. We’ve been living a simpler life with no last-minute dashing to the shops. We’ve just made-do with what we have and we’ve eaten pretty well, even if our diets has been a bit more limited.

Alas, I know there will be a slow reversion back to our bad old ways unless, of course, that Brexit transition period come sot a swift end on December 31. Anyway. Moving swiftly on. . .

Seventies style hair will become fashionable again

Of all my life after lockdown predictions, this has to be the most controversial. In fact, it terrifies me.

A guy I know passed me yesterday as I was taking my daily, Government-mandated exercise. I didn’t recognise him at first because he was sporting unkempt facial hair and the hair on his head, usually quite short, had grown impressively long.

If social distancing / lockdown (call it what you will) continues for too long, I fear some men may get used to this unkempt look and adopt it for the long term. If this happens, I may become a hipster in protest.

The world will be full of pretend intellectuals

In every home across the land, there will be a bookshelf. On it will be titles such as Jean Paul Satre’s The Roads To Freedom, Issac Assimov’s Guide to the Bible and all of Shakespeare’s plays.

Not one of these books, you understand, will have been read. Oh no. With video calls having become the main method of communication, the shelf will be a prop, a backdrop to use when video calling colleagues so they think you’re a bit clever.

The designated driver will be replaced by designated tech support

I’m going to make two predictions here. Firstly, socialising with friends via Zoom or FaceTime will become much more common because it requires less effort.

Secondly, the designated driver will become designated tech support. Yes, someone will have to drink less so they can sort out the WiFi if it cuts out.

Smart casual will take on a whole new meaning

I like my clothes, I really do, but in the past few weeks, our lifestyles have changed hugely. I think we’ve all received a lesson in how few clothes we need and life after lockdown could involve having a smaller wardrobe.

Technophobic bosses and managers reluctant to accept homeworking have met their match. Home working is going to be a lot more common in future and you don’t need to dress up to work in the home office.

I’d hate to think we’re all going to dress like slobs, but this it’s going to be difficult to row back from this. I mean, why not be comfortable while you work?

The iron will go the way of the rotary phone

Allow me to tell you a little story. Some years ago, I was at a historical attraction with my eldest daughter, Helen. In one room, there was an old fashioned rotary phone. Visitors could pick up the phone and dial a number to get a pre-recorded message about the attraction’s history.

I told Helen to pick up the receiver and dial a number. She responded by staring at the thing. Only then did I realise she’d never seen or used a rotary phone so had no idea how it worked.

The point of this story? Our children will look at the steam iron the same way as the rotary phone. I mean come on, when did you last use one?

What predictions do you have?

Have you any predictions for life after lockdown? Maybe you have some ideas about what’ll happen with our cars, with mowing the lawn, the school run or other aspects of our day-to-day lives? As I say, you’d be very welcome to leave a comment below with your ideas.