Dad and daughter heading out for the day together. We had an amazing time.
There is nothing quite like spending one on one time with your kids is there? Following a somewhat chaotic end to 2015, this year was supposed to be slightly calmer, albeit with several weeks of disruption while our new kitchen was installed.
Alas, the year hasn’t thus far worked out as planned. As a result, neither Mrs Adams nor I have spent that much one on one time with our kids recently.
Almost as soon as the clock struck midnight marking 1 January, my wife’s father fell ill. Thankfully he recovered but Gill had to go up to Scotland to visit him. The building work got underway as planned, but has over-run slightly and been more demanding than we realised.
I also had a brief period of illness in February when I had a chest infection. This limited what I was able to do over the half term break and for a while afterwards. All things considered, it has been a demanding 11 weeks.
On Saturday, however, Helen and I got to spend the day together. It was a blog-thing so we weren’t entirely on our own, but we travelled from London to Birmingham together and had the excitement of watching a Davis Cup doubles match in each other’s company.
Both ways on the train Helen cuddled up with me and asked me to read the Enid Blyton story book she’s presently making her way through. Helen ate incredibly well during the day and I didn’t have to tell her off the once.
What’s more impressive is that we had a 5.30am start and didn’t get home until 8pm. A whole fourteen and a half hours in each other’s company and not a stern word spoken!
It’s slightly different with Elizabeth, our youngest child. She is at pre-school part time so we get to spend quite a bit of time together. When we are on our own and she doesn’t have the distraction of her sister, she’s usually very chatty and we have a great time together with few, if any, behavioural issues.
I confess, however, that over recent weeks, with builders working on the house downstairs, that screen-time rules have been relaxed. We’ve snuggled up to watch films together in the afternoons. I do my best to persuade her we should read books instead. Sometimes I get my way, other times I simply roll with it and concede we have to cut a few corners while the house is in disarray.
Helen’s been asking for more one on one time with my wife and I. Her requests have been very specific. She wants to spend a day in London with me so that mummy can spend a day baking with her little sister. Helen then wants to do a swap; spend a day baking with mummy while I take Elizabeth in London.
Saturday was a reminder to me of how important one on one time is. Once this building work is completed, Mrs Adams and I will do all we can to grant the kids their wish.
Honest Mum says
March 7, 2016 at 9:33 pmWe said exactly this when Peter took Xander to Sealife for a bit, that we need to carve out time for one on one with each child. It was wonderful seeing you guys again 🙂
teacuptoria says
March 8, 2016 at 9:04 amI absolutely believe in this. One on one time is so important and can really bring your child on and your relationship on heaps.
Sarah Howe (@RunJumpScrap) says
March 8, 2016 at 7:08 pmHubby has started taking our little one out into town on a Saturday am. The go “to the cafe” which our daughter loves and she is so well behaved. I think that one on one time is so important for you both. Sounds like you had a lovely day together and how cute the next one has been planned! xx #thtruthabout
John Adams says
March 11, 2016 at 11:17 amYeah, gonna see if we can squeeze that promised visit to London next weekend. If so, I will look forward to it loads in the days leading up to it.
Sam says
March 9, 2016 at 10:49 pmI need to spend more one on one time with my eldest and reading this definitely brings that home to me. It is a difficult time for our relationship right now and there have been plenty of times when I have been at my wit’s end but I think you can never go wrong with a bit of devoted attention. He has been asking for me to read him stories and sing him songs at bedtime which is what I do for his little brother. I think that kind of simple time and attention proves more than anything that they are very special to us and that we want them to be happy. Thanks for linking up this week John #thetruthabout
John Adams says
March 11, 2016 at 11:11 amWell Sam, your kids undoubtedly need you but look after yourself. That said, maybe a little one on one time would help you get away from your troubles from time to time? Whatever, best of luck and will be thinking of you.
Adrian says
March 10, 2016 at 1:13 pmSounds like a tricky few months. I feel your building work pain having just emerged from a fourteen week loft conversion. Never want to see a builder again!
It’s brilliant spending all day one on one with your child – I feel like I really got to know my son looking after him on a Friday and I’ll miss him now I’m back doing five days. Will have to plan some special days out at the weekends. Lovely post.
John Adams says
March 11, 2016 at 11:05 amShame you’ve lost your day a week with your little one. Glad, however, to hear your loft conversion has come to an end! That must have been a tough time.
JuggleMum, Nadine Hill says
March 11, 2016 at 9:47 amSo sweet that Helen cuddles up and read a book with you on the train – it is so important to get alone time with each child, we do this regularly too. It was lovely to see you at the Davis Cup and to meet Helen. She was a treasure!
John Adams says
March 11, 2016 at 11:02 amLikewise Nadine, it was great to meet you and your family. Although I’m a bit worried about how I’ll look in the Conga video!!
Tim says
March 12, 2016 at 12:32 amOne-to-one time is as vital as family time, in my opinion. Even if it’s just a short spell here and there, the opportunity to have a proper chat without interruption or to do what the child wants without compromising to the needs of others is so important. With Isaac I talk and feed his curioisity; with Toby I build and feed his imagination; with Kara I, er, do whatever she tells me to do. They’re all different and we only get to explore that properly when we’re one-to-one with them
Carol Cameleon says
March 12, 2016 at 8:55 pmOur little girl is our only one so doesn’t have to compete with sibling attention but with hubby working shifts, I do get to spend much more one on one time with her, which I feel priviledged to be able to do, especially while she is still so young (in my eyes anyway). I make sure I give them an hour or so together on his ‘off’ weekends. and when I do, you can see the genuine love and glee in both their eyes. It’s beautiful. #truthabout