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I can’t stop worrying

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I’m worried about the future. In this Trump / Brexit era, most people are, but to be specific, I’m worried about what the future holds for my kids.

worry, growing up, dadbloguk, dadbloguk.com, parenting, children
I can’t help worrying about these two and their future. I’m their dad. Pic credit: Ania Wilk-Lawton.

Worry, worry, worry: this seems to be what us mums and dads are meant to do. Everyone talks about the early years being the hardest, but in a cruel twist of fate, I think they come with the least worry.

Allow me to elaborate. At the age of six, your child might face a few typical challenges: slightly behind at school, upset at not being invited to a birthday party, a bit of a fussy eater and so on.

I’m looking into the future. What happens 20 or even 30 years’ time?

My mother once told me she worried more about my brothers and I now than she did when we were kids. I can see exactly why.

As teenagers and young adults, my brothers and I have forced my mother and stepfather to deal with the following:

  • Suspension from school
  • Car crashes (minor)
  • Car crashes (serious)
  • Relationship break ups
  • Divorce
  • Financial problems
  • Dropping out of the education system
  • Moving hundreds of miles away
  • What I shall euphemistically call, the influence of toxic friendships.

There is a lot more I could add to that list. In the interests of family harmony, I will leave it there. Suffice it to say all those issues must surely create more stress for a parent than the issues most kids face in the early years.

That’s before I even mention backpacking. Oh my word, the thought of my kids going backpacking utterly terrifies me

I did some crazy stuff as a backpacker and went to places I never want my kids to visit. The worrying thing is, I was always one of the more sensible backpackers (not that this says much).

I have vivid memories of an Australian guy, regaling us with stories of how he and some others went on an unofficial tour of a mountain in Bolivia. It had long been mined for silver and the locals, living in absolute poverty and desperate, used explosives to blast away at the mine in the hope they will discover silver.

Sure enough, he and his backpacking chums witnessed all this. He thought it was incredibly cool to be hiding in a Bolivian mountain and looking on as peasant miners with a life expectancy of 30 used explosives to blow holes into the rock.

The thought of my kids doing this kind of thing makes my blood run cold. They will travel, of course they will, but I need time to get my head around it. Before they go anywhere independently, they’ll be getting a very serious lecture about the etiquette to follow when invited to watch as poverty-stricken humans risk their lives simply to feed themselves.

I worried when Helen and Izzy were born. I worried when she started pre-school and nursery and I worried when Helen started school and made her way through Foundation Stage and Key Stages One and Two. I’m now worrying as Izzy prepares to start school.

I may as well get used to it. It clearly isn’t going to get any easier.

DIY Daddy Blog

18 thoughts on “I can’t stop worrying”

  1. Lisa | Pass The Prosecco Please

    Worry is the worst part of loving your children, it just seems to get worse the older they get! #ThatFridayLinky

  2. It can be worrying thinking about the future. We try hard as parents to bring our children up in the right environment, however in the long run, there’s things that we can’t control that will happen. We just need to be there for them whenever they need us. Thanks for sharing. #thatfridaylinky

  3. I completely understand! I feel since becoming a dad i just worry all the time. There is always a milestone to achieve or the next bi thing coming up like switching to a big boy bed, or starting nursery. My dad told me when he knew i was becoming a dad that the first thirty years are the hardest… i was thirty at the time…! I don’t think it’ll ever get easier… but we wouldn’t swap it for anything,eh?

    1. Now it’s true Tom, I wouldn’t swap for anything else. fatherhood has, however, made my life one of worry and concern!

  4. It’s all part of the parenting game. As they grow the worries change and yes, I think you are absolutely spot on when you say the most worry you give your parents is as a teen and young adult. They need to spread their wings a bit in the big bad world, so we give them the tools they need and then hope and pray they make the right decisions; if they don’t we pick the bits up and help them get back on track. The good thing is, most of the time the joy outweighs the worry #ThatFridayLinky

  5. Jo - Pickle & Poppet

    My children are only 3 and under 1, but knowing the world we have brought them into makes me worry and that’s before all of the other things.
    My parents used to tell me that they worried when I went out etc and I would laugh – I remember them always saying, you wait until you have kids. I now have an understanding what they meant!

    1. I am exactly the same. Didn’t understand what my parents were getting so worked up about. And no I have kids of my own, I totally understand.

  6. The world certainly is a scary place right now, and you’re right, i hate to think that my girls will do the same as i did as teens. I suppose it’s all part of growing up, but that scares the living daylights out of me!! #ThatFridayLinky

  7. This post has haunted me since I read it a couple of days ago. I wrote something similar about my childhood against my children’s and is the world safer now and then. The truth is we will worry and probably more now especially with what my five years old face. Totally identify with your youth the things I got up to it worries me immensely that they may do the same or worse. Still won’t be able to stop it just advise hopefully it works. A fab thought provoking post mate Thanks for linking to the #THAT FRIDAY LINKY come back next week please

    1. Glad you found it thought provoking. I remember your post about childhood and whether the world was safer in the old days. I am planning to be back this week, time permitting.

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